‘I stumbled on my dad’s porn. The girl was young, like me. In shock, I watched the man on TV do the things that happened to me.’: Woman survives child sexual abuse, says there’s always ‘light waiting to wrap you up’

“My dad went downstairs to get ready for work. When he didn’t come up, we figured he was asleep. At 9 a.m. my mom’s screams pierced every cell in my body. I turned the corner and saw his body. He was exposed, sitting in his chair in front of naked women running across TV, his lifeless eyes staring at the ground. ‘How could you die like this, dad?’ I tied his robe closed, called 911, and ran outside. My hero was not who I thought he was.”

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“I was about to move out, but I found out I was pregnant. I was running on fumes. I felt like I’d made a huge mistake becoming a mom. I wasn’t good at this. I drank to cope. My marriage ended explosively. I finally decided enough was enough when my daughter started copying everything I do. She reached for my beer, and I remember deciding, it was time to be done. For good. That was 8 months ago.”

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