‘How could a perfectly healthy baby just stop breathing? How could I lose my baby like that? Why would this happen to me?’

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“From the day William and I got together, we knew we wanted a family together. He was my best friend and had been for the longest time. We started trying 3 days after we officially got into a relationship (sounds crazy, huh? But when you know, you JUST KNOW.) On June 18, 2017, I woke up to take a trip to the bathroom and realized it was Father’s Day. I had a feeling I was pregnant since I had already been pregnant twice, so I took a pregnancy test and that started our journey. How perfect is it to find out you’re pregnant on Father’s Day? I was so excited to tell William so I made a onesie at 5 o’clock in the morning so that when William woke up he could be surprised. We were so happy!

Courtesy of Tinsley Brosset

The pregnancy was the hardest one yet. I was always sick, always grouchy and always hurting. Having my sister-in-law as a pregnancy partner helped a lot and we loved planning fun things for our babies to do in their future. We went together to find out the sex of our babies and like everybody wished, we were both having two perfectly healthy baby boys! We knew they would be best friends. Percy and Baby William, cousins closer than brothers. Percy Levi James Serpas was born on February 10, 2018, and Roy William (Lil Will) Brosset III made his arrival, not too long after, on February 16, 2018. 7 pounds 3 ounces of pure perfection! He looked just like his daddy and had his temper to match. Our family was complete. Mommy, Daddy, both sisters and the rest of our family and friends were so in love and happy for us.

Courtesy of Tinsley Brosset

When we got home from the hospital, everything carried on as normal. Our baby was healthy and sweet and we were so proud to have him. He was growing and had everyone wrapped around his little finger!

We never thought only 24 days into his short, precious life he would be so suddenly taken from us. It was March 12, 2018, and William got up at 4 a.m. to go to work like usual. He kissed me goodbye and hurried out of the bedroom to find his work clothes. It was weird that he didn’t kiss Will because he did every other morning. Whenever he left the room I realized that Lil Will hadn’t woken up all night to eat. I turned to check on him and I couldn’t see him breathing, so I placed my hand on his cheek. It was ice cold. I picked him up and realized instantly he was gone. He was so stiff and cold, and he had blood running out of his mouth and nose. I screamed for William to call 911. I’ll never forget the words because they have played over in my head for months now as I visualize my son’s lifeless body and my 2-year-old daughter’s terrified face as she woke up to find her baby brother dead. ‘Oh my God William, call 911. Our baby is bleeding from his mouth and his nose!’

After that it is all a blur. I remember thinking I was in a horrible dream and when I realized I wasn’t dreaming, all I could do was cry, scream, pray and call my Pawpaw who had been in the funeral business since he was, well, born. He answered on the second ring. Something that comes natural whenever you’ve been in that business so long. I was screaming like a crazy person and all I could say to him was ‘Pawpaw my baby died.’ I never thought in a million years that my Grandparents would have to bury their great-grandson. I never thought in a million years I would have to bury my own son. Something so unnatural. While I was in this crazy, spastic stage, my husband called 911, his family and boss. The first person to arrive at our house was a sheriff’s deputy. When he stepped out of the car, I realized it was Kyle. I had grown up with him my whole life. It felt good to see a familiar face but I felt terrible for him having to witness this. I yelled, ‘Kyle, my baby is gone, please hurry.’ He ran and I swear I think he made it from my front gate to my door in 2 seconds. He started CPR, then the ambulance arrived and transported him to the local hospital. We followed the ambulance and it seemed like our whole family showed up in minutes. There we were with our whole life crashing down around us.

We planned the funeral with the help of our family and tried to make it through, but the truth was, we couldn’t eat, sleep, think or even hardly talk. I felt like I had been up partying for 3 weeks straight. It was taking such a toll on my body and mind. I could never thank Southern Funeral Home, Mr. Cody Cheatwood and Mr. Hoot Caskey enough for helping us so much and being so understanding at a time like that. The whole community came together and showed us so much love and support, and for that, I will be forever grateful. We don’t have a gravestone yet, but his sisters like to visit his burial spot to bring him toys.

Courtesy of Tinsley Brosset

We found out it was SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) that took our sweet precious angel away. Damn that SIDS. How could a perfectly healthy baby just stop breathing? How could I lose my baby like that? Why would this happen to me?

I cry every day for him and I smile every day for him. I look at his cousin, Percy and wonder what he would be like, if they would get along or if they would be the same size. I want his memory to be carried on. His death has affected every aspect of our lives. We miss him all the time and though we still don’t understand it, we are taking it day by day and we pray that God grants us peace and comfort. No one ever thinks it will happen to them until it does. Please cherish every moment you have with your loved ones because tomorrow is never promised. We hope that one day we can be blessed with another precious baby even though he or she could never replace our Lil Will. One day we will meet him again, but until then I will do everything in my power to make him and his sisters proud and to inform others about SIDS. You can learn fast facts about SIDS by visiting this website.”

Courtesy of Tinsley Brosset

This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Tinsley Brosset of Louisiana. Submit your story here, and subscribe to our best stories in our free newsletter here.

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