Ten true things about the first year of motherhood

“Postpartum bodies are squashy and wobbly and dimpled and stretched and foreign and embarrassing and difficult and painful and gorgeously imperfect, and they tend to stay that way for quite awhile. You made a human. Now make your peace.”

‘It’s only a matter of time before I’m served a restraining order from Chick-Fil-A. I don’t blame them. Not even a little.’ Mom hilariously recounts son’s ‘horrific’ diarrhea mishap at Chick-Fil-A

“I thought I had this ‘taking the kids out to eat’ thing down to a science. I let my guard down. About 5 minutes in, an employee asked, ‘Ma’am, is that your son in the bathroom?’ I stared at him, confused. When I opened the bathroom door, I did the only thing that seemed natural. I laughed. Like, REALLY laughed. Tears-pouring-down-my-face, couldn’t-talk-couldn’t-breathe kind of laughing. I couldn’t get it together.”

The letter your teenager wishes he could write you

“This fight we are in right now. I need it. I need this fight. I can’t tell you this because I don’t have the language for it and it wouldn’t make sense anyway. But I need this fight. Badly.”

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