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‘I’ve birthed an entire child in the time it takes my husband to poop. Actually, I’ve done it faster!’: Wife hilariously calls out husband for his long bathroom trips to ‘avoid hemorrhoids’

“Not only did I accomplish this amazing feat faster than he can, I did it while people WATCHED. This achievement was done with bright lights shining down there to illuminate my lady bits. My husband? He gets to hide in a secluded bathroom. He dies inside when a child even knocks on the door.”

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