“I’ve had random fainting spells since I had my very first period. I told the lady next to me, ‘I am going to pass out.’ I remember bending my knees, and then I was out. Doctors kept going back to my blood sugar, but I knew that wasn’t it. This is when all my issues began.”
‘Sit down, sit down!’ I fell, hitting my head on the concrete floor. It’s so hard to deal with and so scary.’: Young woman’s harrowing journey to Chronic Fatigue Syndrome diagnosis
‘I know you know something has happened. I am so sorry you have to feel this pain. I am so sorry daddy died.’
“I wish I could right the horrible wrong that was done. I see you look at that perfect picture of daddy. I wish I could tell you he was coming back home. But my dear son, he is not.”
‘Asheville?,’ he asked. I smiled. He promised it would be our next destination together. That dream died the day he did.’
“I am finally going to this special place, but he is not taking me there. Instead, I am taking him. It is there on that mountain I will let him go.”
‘Then I received this email. ‘Hi there, My dad has been fighting cancer. Dad is getting weaker by the day. We have to do this as soon as possible.’
“I couldn’t keep it together to talk on the phone. This is a very difficult and dark time, but I know how you feel about love. We are throwing this plan together really fast. We don’t know how long we have.”
‘Good job Mommy. You came just in time.’ I asked her why. She replied, ‘I didn’t want Addison to feel bad that I have two daddies, and she only has one.’
“‘Why would she feel bad?,’ I asked. It was in that moment, I knew I would never have to worry about Emma missing a piece of her heart. It never left her. Unlike her younger siblings, she has two daddies that love her. Her daddy here at home, and her daddy in heaven.”
‘I will always have my dad in Heaven. Will you be my father forever?’ My high school sweetheart was shot and killed at a party. I was left a single mom, lost without my best friend.’
“This man stepped up and took care of this amazing little boy when his daddy was taken from this world. Connor asked if he could ask Jonathan to adopt him. ‘Why do you want to do that?,’ I asked. ‘To make it official,’ he replied. ‘I want to surprise him.’”
‘I took a call of a baby not breathing. It’s the dreaded call. I heard the baby crying. It was short lived. I hung my head and tried to clear the lump from my throat.’
“What I didn’t expect was a visit from the fire crew that was on scene and who, like true heroes, tried to save that baby’s life. They came in together, stood before me and asked if we could all share a hug.”
‘I walked into his house. When I saw the bags from Victoria’s Secret, I knew what he had in store. It was Valentine’s Day, and it’s pretty obvious what a grown man had on his mind.’
“I gave him the coy smile, in an attempt to be sexy. I probably tried to wink at him, and did my best to slither over to the bed. One long stride in front of the other, knocking my hips from left to right, hoping to look like Marilyn Monroe but most likely – didn’t. He slowly sat down next to me.”
‘I’m ok mom, I love you too,’ was the last thing he said to me. That was 10:20 on Saturday night.’: Mother tragically loses her ‘best friend’ son to heroin overdose
“He always answered my calls. But on Sunday morning, he didn’t. And I just knew he was gone. The only way I can explain this pain is that every cell in my body that created my son is on fire yearning to hold him again. It’s a physical pain only a mother would know. It’s in my bone marrow. Just a deep yearning to touch him, and hold him.”
‘The ache in my heart starts around the holidays. I know I am being ‘watched.’ I’m actually afraid everyone will think I have moved on and forgotten my son.’
“Everyone asked if we were doing anything special in honor of Alex on the first anniversary of his death. I refuse, to this day, to call it an anniversary. It is the day our lives changed forever. Anniversaries are for celebrating. So I just call it the day Alex died.”
