eating disorder

‘Your dad thought he could hit me, but you will NEVER hit me. I’ll kill you first.’ She was a 400-pound woman. I was a 9-year-old child.’: Woman survives child abuse and PTSD, repairs relationship with abusers, ‘I was born a SURVIVOR’

“She had me by my pigtails. She cornered me into our closet using a man’s belt to spank me. A friend saw her, and told her if she ever hit me again, he’d tell his dad. Later my mom tried having me committed to a mental hospital. After a 24-hour sit in at the ER, a doctor came in. ‘There is nothing wrong with you, except the fact you need to get away from your mother.’ I wanted a mom who WANTED to be my mom.”

‘Oooh tough week? What happened, honey?’ I was 15. Women I’d never met were commenting on my weight.’: Woman discovers intuitive eating, self-love after struggling with weight for years, ‘My children will see a vibrant, smart, STRONG woman’

“’Really? That’s what you’re going to eat for breakfast?’ I vividly remember holding my two pieces of cinnamon toast in my trembling hands. Every single one of my siblings had already toasted their bread, buttered it, and sprinkled it with cinnamon and sugar. Yet, I was the only one singled out by my grandpa. Age 15, I began attending meetings every week with my mother. Strange adult women would applaud and beam at me. I was given jewelry to celebrate my ‘hard work.’ Women twice my age would ask what my ‘secret’ was.”

‘My mom would say I was ‘ballooning.’ I was in 4th grade. She’d implement some new weird food rule for my ‘health.’: Woman is ‘blown away’ by body positive community, ‘I learned to love myself, heal my relationship with my body and soul’

“Maybe my mom thought I wasn’t smart enough to hear what she was really saying: ‘My daughter is broken, how do I fix her?’ I was working out. I was doing everything right, wasn’t I? ‘Why am I still fat?,’ I asked myself. I was 10. Eating 500 calories a day, no cheating. But it was there, in that despair, that my life started to change. I came across a plus-size woman’s account and was… blown away.”

‘Look, she’s eating something!’ I hear the whisper. I feel the cold gnawing at the bottom of my stomach. I hate it and I love it.’: After 12 years battling anorexia, ED survivor learns to accept new plus-size body

“My brother makes me a sandwich when he sees I didn’t eat lunch. My bones poke up under my skin. ‘Please eat it,’ he begs. ‘You need to eat.’ It is so sweet of him, so I eat a few bites. But when he leaves, I give the rest to the dogs. They leave no evidence. Nothing in the trash for my dad to find when he empties it, nothing to clog the toilet. I have become clever in the ways of secret self-destruction.”

‘I wouldn’t use Chapstick. I was afraid I might lick my lips and accidentally swallow some of it, convinced it would make me fat.’: Woman suffering eating disorder is admitted to recovery center, ‘We aren’t treated like people. We were treated like patients’

“All doors were alarmed, and I was surrounded by strangers. My identical twin made me a blanket to take to treatment. She wanted me to feel at home. The staff wouldn’t allow me to have it. Since I was still on Red level, I wasn’t allowed into my bedroom. I sat on the floor in the hallway by my room and cried to my mom on the phone, begging her to bring me home. As I cried on the floor, a patient walked up to me and handed me a little slip of paper. He had written ‘You can do this’ on a scrap of paper. I sobbed. I still have his note.”

‘Karen didn’t make it.’ My heart dropped. The day I planned to kill myself, I lost my friend to a motorcycle wreck.’: Man battling suicide vows to ‘keep going’ after friend’s unexpected death

“I went to work like normal. I put on my ‘happy face.’ Nobody knew what I planned to do after my shift. Living alone, I didn’t have anyone to stop me this time. When I went back to the service desk, the phone rang. I could tell Pam had been crying. ‘She didn’t make it.’ I fell up against the wall. I couldn’t breathe or swallow. I had to break the news to my co-workers. That night, I sat on my porch. I blurted out, ‘I don’t want to die anymore.’ As soon as I said it, this huge amount of pressure was just taken off of my chest. I had to keep going.”

‘The smallest amount of saliva could drown him. 2 hours later, an angel of a nurse was handing me the tiniest little guy.’: Couple adopts 2 children with special needs making them parents of 5, ‘He has defied every odd and broken every barrier’

“It was my first blind date. We met at a park. He had a horrible outfit on. Green long-sleeve silk shirt, cut off jean shorts and boat shoes. He was bragging about his wild weekend. I was annoyed. 3 weeks after our first ‘date,’ I was hospitalized for an eating disorder. The first time he called I was in rehab. Our whirlwind romance began. We were engaged 6 months later and married 4 months after that, just after my 18th birthday. All I wanted was to be a mom and start a family.”

‘I was so scared to tell anyone and ruin things. I felt I was losing my best friend to another girl who was thin. My life was spiraling.’: Gender fluid individual finds self-love after battling anorexia

“I was the wrong sex. I kept telling myself the more weight I lost, the better it would get. I just hadn’t lost enough yet. I spent my free time counting calories and thinking up convincing lies if anyone were to ask. I changed who I was before I knew who I was, and I lost any identity I had.”

‘I called him from a crackhouse. ‘I don’t know you very well, but if you don’t come for me, I’m going to die here.’: Woman overcomes lifelong battle with addiction, ‘I finally found how to love myself’

“I was invited to a party across the street. There were white rocks on the table. I asked, ‘What is that?’ They asked me if I wanted to try it. The second it went into my body, I was already addicted. In the middle of winter, I walked down the street with no shoes as blood ran down my legs. After ONE HIT, I went from start athlete to sticking needles in my arms in abandoned apartment buildings. I sold my body, my soul, and everything for the next one.”

‘We’re right here, Lauren. You’re okay.’ I didn’t want to die. My sisters clasped my hands tightly as tears rolled down my cheeks.’: Woman finds inner peace after lifelong battle with anorexia, alcoholism

“‘You’re not leaving this table until you finish what is on your plate! Do you hear me?’ My parents begged, pleaded, and demanded me to eat. But my disease was much bigger than them. At 5’11” and 86 pounds, I was admitted to a hospital away from my school, my family, my friends – everything I knew. I’ll never forget the absolute horror of having to be pried off of my parents, not knowing when I would see them again.”

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