infant loss

‘We played, smiled, sang. Daddy took him downstairs. At 5:15 a.m., my beautiful little boy was unresponsive.’: Mom loses her son to SIDS, claims ‘not a day goes by where I don’t cry’

“I immediately began CPR. He still had a pulse and I was determined. I was so, so in love with this little man. The entire ambulance ride was a blur. I sat there, watching them work on my 4-month-old, tiny son. ‘Not my beautiful baby!’ We were such good parents. How could this happen to us? We finally left the hospital having to tell my other son the hardest conversation I’ve ever had. It was the worst nightmare ever.”

‘You promise you’ll hang a wind chime for my son?’ I felt each syllable. His shaky jaw dropped against my shoulder.’: Nurse hangs wind chimes to honor each ‘angel baby’ she delivers

“For a year, it’s been my greatest honor to litter chimes among tree leaves where hummingbirds fly. You and your husband know this. Shared from one of the private corridors of my heart. Spilled out of my trembling mouth during one of our many discussions of how Nurses behave at home. How we process bad outcomes. How we offload shifts like the very one I was in the middle of. Dead babies are not supposed to happen to us, but here you are. A nurse. One of us. Your son was my 21st wind chime.”

‘It’s just cells. Don’t beat yourself up over it.’ That was it. I was sent on my merry way to mourn the loss of my child.’: Woman delivers rainbow baby after losing 7 children

“I remember crawling to the bathroom feeling like a knife was running its way from my navel down, unbeknownst to me that I was even pregnant. I remember sitting there thinking, ‘I’m going to be one of those people on that TV show ‘I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant’. Then, I felt the release of my dead baby. The ER doctor told me, ‘Oh, use a heating pad for any pain.’ That’s it. No follow up, no resources available, just use a heating pad.”

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