infant loss

‘I saw my kids dead, over and over. It was my constant fear.’: Mom suffers severe PTSD after losing daughter to Sudden Unexplained Death in Childhood

“I lived in terror after my daughter died. I had to turn on the light every 5 minutes to check on my kids, because I knew for certain one of them had stopped breathing. I didn’t realize I had PTSD. I just felt like I was losing my mind. I was so stressed, the panic just kept coming. Many people think PTSD only happens to soldiers. It doesn’t.”

‘Mom she’s gone, I just know.’ I sat on my stairs with my front door open, in shock.’: How this ‘broken’ mother helps other parents of child loss heal after her own tragedy

“Seeing my sweet baby girl laying in a huge bed, much too big for her, made me fall to my knees. A nurse said to me, ‘Get off the floor, it’s so dirty.’ I was angry at her, I was angry at the hospital chaplain placing his eerie hand on my shoulder with no real comfort. No parent should have to write their child’s eulogy, or decide between a casket or an urn. I had absolutely no idea what I was doing.”

‘Instead of decorating a nursery or washing tiny clothes, I had to explain to your toddler sisters why you’re an angel.’: Family shares 1 ‘quick, beautiful’ hour with newborn son before his last breaths

“Little Fitz, oh how I wish we could bring you home. It pains me knowing we won’t be able to see you take your first steps or spit out mushed-up peas. I won’t be able to see a brace-faced boy awkwardly place a corsage on a girl’s wrist before a high school dance, freak out in a parking lot when teaching you to drive, or help you move into your college dorm. I wonder what you would’ve been like, what you would’ve done, and how you’d change the world.”

‘Here we go.’ We started the process of reversing his vasectomy. My husband had no intention of having more children.’: Couple shares adventure of trying-to-conceive after doctor says they have ‘no answers’

“I told Jeremy, ‘We need to talk.’ I was so nervous my voice trembled. I told him, ‘A few days ago I took a pregnancy test. It was positive.’ He gasped and immediately smiled. I continued, ‘but after getting my blood work repeated, my levels are not increasing. I started bleeding on the drive down.’ His smile quickly turned to confusion. ‘So you weren’t pregnant?’ He couldn’t understand how something could begin and end all so quickly.”

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