infertility

‘There are concerns in the ultrasound.’ My doctor used scare tactics to push me into terminating my baby. I tried not to break down.’ Mom fights back after being pressured to abort baby with brain defects 

“My doctor told the story of another mom’s heartache to scare me into doing what she wanted me to do. Why was she pushing termination on me SO hard? And why the heck was she calling to tell me over the phone?! Not ONCE did she apologize or say, ‘I’m so sorry.’ Instead, she told me how to parent.”

‘I sobbed as my husband picked up. He knew immediately it was a ‘no.’ We made plans of all the ways I’d ‘surprise’ him with a pregnancy announcement. This call was NOT part of our plan.’

“’Katie, is now an okay time to talk?’ It was our IVF coordinator. ‘Unfortunately, I don’t have very good news.’ I choked back tears, and thanked her. He had a total of 12 sperm. My husband hugged me and apologized. It was heartbreaking. Our doctor grabbed my hand. I looked at her in disbelief.”

‘Daniel may have trouble fathering children. He had a botched surgery when he was very young. As 18-year-olds, we didn’t grasp the seriousness of his male infertility. Then I realized something was wrong with me, too.’

“My husband’s counts had dropped to almost nothing. Six live sperm were found. Six! No six thousand. Just six. We got a letter in the mail. The yearly fee to keep his sperm frozen was due. It was hundreds of dollars. We had to make a decision about our future– right now. At 26 years old, I VOLUNTARILY had a hysterectomy. Then, we got the call.”

‘The expectant mom is moving forward with another adoptive family.’ We had the car seat and crib ready. We spent days holding her precious baby girl. Then, we got the call. I was heartbroken.’

“There was a sinking feeling. We loved this little girl and her parents so much. We thought it was everything we dreamt of. It’s the most confusing feeling to grieve the loss of something we never really had while at the same time being happy for this family we fell in love with.”

‘When we were just about done with the foster process, I GOT PREGNANT. I peed on 14 sticks because I couldn’t believe it. We thought we were ready. I didn’t realize the roller coaster it’d be.’

“We had a 6-month-old baby and added an emotional 5-year-old to the mix. There were days where I felt like I was babysitting someone else’s kids. People told me I wouldn’t be able to love these children as my own. You come in expecting everything to fall into place. It doesn’t work like that. I had no idea what I was doing.”

‘Wow, that’s so cool I have 2 moms! May I have a snack?,’ was his reaction at age 5. ‘Aren’t you worried they’ll take the boys back?’ We are not a bit worried. We told him he grew up in her tummy.’

“And then we met her – this gorgeous strawberry blond young lady with the most beautiful green eyes looking at us from across the table. She had one question for us. Our knees were shaking just getting the news. We were not convinced it would be ‘wonderful’ at all. We were intimidated and scared.”

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