life after loss

‘My heart skipped a beat. A single outfit stopped me in my tracks. It was a familiar print, from my son’s final outfit.’: Mom caught off guard by emotional memory when she least expected it, ‘I fought back tears’

“Tiny little elephants danced across the pink fleece in front of me. It was a familiar print. I’d entered that very store years ago, searching for a final outfit for my gravely ill son. Shoppers were oblivious to me. As I got my daughter dressed, she smiled back at me. I teared up.”

‘Is there something wrong with her head?’ Matt insisted on an answer. He bowed his head in prayer. I held his hand tight.’: Mom loses daughter to anencephaly, ‘Rachel made me a better person. She is safe and I will see her again.’

“‘She’s going to live, right?’ The doctor looked at me and said words I will never forget… ‘These babies don’t live.’ She handed me a box of rough, thin tissues and left the room. I completely lost all composure and thrashed around that room like I myself was being killed. ‘Not my girl… not my girl…’ I asked Matt, ‘What are we going to do?’ Without a pause, my brave husband said, ‘We’re going to give her a name.’”

‘I regret so much. Not following my mommy instinct. I’m sorry. I did my 40-minute walk on the treadmill, hoping that would wake you up.’: Mother writes letter to baby born sleeping, ‘I’m so sorry I couldn’t save you.’

“The first words out of my mouth as my body flooded with oxytocin were, ‘You are so cute.’ You were perfect, big lips, small button nose, the cutest most perfect feet I have ever seen. I said out loud to your dad multiple times that you just were so quiet in there, and I hoped you were okay. I’m so sorry I couldn’t save you. Looking at you, finally, was the most magical moment.”

‘Are you Emmett’s wife? Ma’am, there’s been an accident. Your husband was killed.’ Heart stops. Murdered. Affair. Gun. Father of 5.’: Woman learns to be grateful for ‘fragile blessings’ after husband murdered by his lover’s spouse, ‘There is still hope’

“Something was so wrong. I held my screaming baby and I bounced. My phone sat nearby, silent. Bouncing, screaming, tears rolling down my cheeks. At 10 p.m., I was overcome by sheer panic. I called and texted him many times. No response. 1 a.m. Knock, knock. I couldn’t breathe. All the secrets were finally being told to me. ‘Ma’am, your husband was killed at Walgreens.’ Heart stops. I don’t remember a single word, just pieces. Murdered. Affair. Gun. Father of 5.”

‘Geoff… GEOFF?!’ His eyes were wide open, staring at the sky struggling to breathe. He went limp.’: Pregnant woman loses husband from freak seizure on vacation, ‘they wouldn’t let me see him’

“We went on an organized boat trip. My husband decided to go in for a swim. 5 minutes in, he started to have some sort of seizure in the water. They took him to shore, leaving us on the main boat. I shouted at the captain, ‘Bring us back!’ The answer I got was chilling: ‘You need to think of the other people who paid for this trip, I cannot just turn the boat around.’ It took us another 2 days to find out where they had taken him.”

‘It’s OK to let go, baby. We promise he’ll take care of you.’ I felt her life leave her broken body.’: Couple lose newborn daughter to ‘totally random umbilical cord accident’

“She was suffering. The nurse wanted to try another medication to help ease her pain. Our daughter had an immediate reaction and stopped breathing. My baby was dying in my living room. Matt was racing home from work. ‘Please never let her suffer this way ever again.’ My heart couldn’t handle watching my baby endure this. Her body was tired. She’s now an angel in heaven.”

‘Where is my fridge?’ I asked, annoyed. I tapped my foot, waiting. ‘What?’ My jugular started pounding.’: Mom hilariously recalls really ‘bad day’ with teenage daughter when she lost her temper

“I came home from work, tired and weary. I crawled out of my car and shuffled past it. The open space where the mini fridge USED to be. ‘Did I get burglarized?’ Then, steam poured from my ears. ‘Teenagers!!!,’ I exclaimed. I balled my fists, losing my ever-loving mind. Oh, they know. Momma is ticked.”

‘I flat out asked, ‘Would I be able to take my own photos during my C-section?’ She looked puzzled.’: Woman photographs her own C-section after losing baby in same OR last year, ‘That is empowering as hell’

“Mike shouted, ‘It’s a boy!’ I was clicking away, fighting back tears, trying to see my new babe, focus my camera. This was a surreal experience. Just 371 days before, in the exact same OR, our little Clark was also pulled out at this exact same spot. But there was no crying, no excited cheers, no shouts of ‘it’s a boy!’ He was born still. We knew our Clark sent this little one from heaven to be with us. Teddy’s birth was not only empowering, it was incredibly healing, too.”

‘He had curly blond hair, a perfect nose, pouty lips. They told me he was beautiful. I didn’t get to see.’: Mother survives ‘worst trauma’ after losing newborn son, insists daughter will grow up knowing big brother is ‘watching over her’

“I made the decision not to see and hold Jensen. It’s one of my biggest regrets I’ll ever have in my life. Honestly, I didn’t know how I could do it. I didn’t realize the permanence of him being really gone. Instead, I asked for a lock of his hair, and for them to take pictures of him. I wish I could go back to that moment, spend time kissing him. I wish I could’ve whispered in his ear, ‘I love you.’”

‘Let’s get married now, this weekend.’ Her response killed me. ‘No, you don’t have to do this.’: Husband’s young wife dies of cancer, she gives him ‘gift’ of second wife, ‘There wasn’t an ounce of jealousy from this woman’

“‘The doctors said the chemo will mean I won’t ever have kids. I know how bad you want to be a dad. Don’t do this.’ ‘NO!’ I said. I planned the wedding for 2 days later. She’d been looking for a dress. Each bride had their wedding day on a name tag they wore. Melissa’s said ‘TODAY.’ Some were confused. Moments later, her eyes lit up. This gown, like Cinderella’s, would need no alteration. 10 months after our wedding day, she gave me the gift. ‘I love you, and I promise to learn to love whoever you choose after me.’”

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