my son

‘I let a man who I wanted to love me, put a needle full of meth into my arm. Within 6 months, I lost my son.’ Woman’s journey from ‘successful businesswoman’ to ‘dying drug addict’

“Life as I knew it ended with the prick of a needle. I was a successful businesswoman, living a normal life. I paid my bills, owned a home, and did the right things. But at the age of 34, I made a choice that changed my life forever. My single lapse in judgement separated me from my son, annihilated my morals, and almost killed me.”

‘Instead of decorating a nursery or washing tiny clothes, I had to explain to your toddler sisters why you’re an angel.’: Family shares 1 ‘quick, beautiful’ hour with newborn son before his last breaths

“Little Fitz, oh how I wish we could bring you home. It pains me knowing we won’t be able to see you take your first steps or spit out mushed-up peas. I won’t be able to see a brace-faced boy awkwardly place a corsage on a girl’s wrist before a high school dance, freak out in a parking lot when teaching you to drive, or help you move into your college dorm. I wonder what you would’ve been like, what you would’ve done, and how you’d change the world.”

‘I heard two words: ‘fugitive felon.’ I caught my son’s eye. His shackles made my stomach flutter uncontrollably. His public defender smoothed her beige suit, and approached him.’

“The severely criminal charge was, in fact, a reference to my 24-year-old. I never imagined that term would apply to him. An unexpected call helped me through his transfer to prison. It had been weeks without contact when I answered the unfamiliar number. I fought back tears. He told me how much my son loved me.”

‘I dropped him off at another woman’s house. He lied. I was heavily pregnant. And now I just dropped my boyfriend off at another woman’s house. I was officially a single mother.’

“My boyfriend told me about a job opportunity that would allow me to be a stay-at-home mom. Downside? It was 2 hours away. He was insistent on going, and who was I to turn down that opportunity? So, I drove him. I dropped him off at a relative’s house. Kissed him goodbye. Something didn’t feel right, but I went with it.”

‘Get here now! It’s bad, it’s real bad.’ I jumped out of bed and yelled, ‘We have to go now! Something has happened.’ I knelt down beside him. ‘I am so sorry son, I love you so much Joshua.’

“My fiancé hardly had the car in park. I jumped out and ran down the driveway toward my son. Before I could get to Josh, two police officers held me back. I cried out, ‘My baby, my baby, I want my baby!’ At that moment, I knew my worst nightmare had come true. My precious son was gone in a blink of an eye.”

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