painful

‘Do you want to resuscitate?’ We needed to let him go. Sobbing, I told them, ‘No.’ It was time to stop fighting.’: Mom admits rainbow baby’s birth was ‘bittersweet’ after losing brother to ‘ultra-rare recessive disease’

“Furniture blocked off the hallway to give us privacy as we said goodbye. I watched my husband hold his son for the first and last time; I’d never seen him so broken. We held his hands and kissed his head, telling him we loved him, he didn’t need to fight any longer. When the doctor pronounced him, I asked her to carry him to the hospital morgue. I couldn’t do it myself. She swaddled him in a blanket, and left.”

‘Unsafe and idiotic,’ is how they described it. I was hurt. I cried heavy tears all night.’: Mom insists ‘evil will not win’ after neighbor confronts her about memorial for her late son

“This neighborhood has been such a safe space for me since my son died. But this is heartbreaking. Each year on the anniversary of my son’s death, we hold a small memorial for him. Last night, I had a confrontation with our neighbors, a husband and a wife, who threatened to ‘report’ us if we do our memorial this year.”

‘She sat next to her dying father, her best friend, and grabbed his hand. She whispered in his ear it was ‘ok to go.’ She would be alright. He could stop being in pain.’

“With her hair in a ponytail and her face stained with tears, she pet his hair while he gasped for air. She put a cross in his hand when she knew he was never coming back. She kissed him on the cheek and uttered ‘goodbye.’ She sat with him for an hour after he stopped breathing, making sure he was not alone.”

‘I said ‘I don’t want to live anymore, my kids deserve better than this, I should have never had them and dragged them down with me’ I wanted a lifeline. I wanted that chance of hope.’

“But instead I got ‘you should feel so lucky! You are blessed.’ Imagine telling yourself you’re so worthless, you’re not deserving, that you literally mess everything you touch and feeling guilty for all of that, like a tumble dryer in your head, swirling around and then someone says, ‘be grateful’”

‘My dad wanted to be cremated. Then he died, and I didn’t know how badly those ashes would haunt me.’: Daughter ‘appalled’ by father’s ashes, keeps them ‘hidden away’ in plastic bag

“The idea crumbled me. Knowing he was at the crematory, and knowing it’d be his turn. Was I eating lunch when they loaded his body in? Was I nursing my twins? Even talking about this is so shameful. His ashes sit in a cupboard. I know they’re there. But I don’t want to see them.”

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