stillbirth

‘I kept crying out, ‘Please wait! It’s too early!’ I was 19, pregnant with quadruplets. My water broke at just 24 weeks and wouldn’t stop.’: Teen mom births miracle micro-preeme after losing 3 of her quadruplets

“I stopped feeling my girls move. I lifted my shirt over my baby bump. I could see the ultrasound as the tech moved the wand around. I knew immediately something was wrong. I started to cry to my fiancé. ‘I can’t lose my babies. I can’t.’ The words were burned into me, ‘Babies B and C no longer have heartbeats.’ My cervix was giving out. ‘What else could go wrong?,’ I asked. I had to stay strong so my survivor could have a chance.”

‘Can’t you just cut him out?’ It hit me. I have to give birth to my dead son. He was so beautiful.’: Mom ‘didn’t get a conclusive reason’ for child’s death, ‘the autopsy showed a perfectly healthy, fully formed baby boy’

“He had big hands and feet, chubby little cheeks, a perfect button nose, bright red lips and a little dimple chin. My fiancé burst into tears. ‘I’m absolutely heartbroken.’ We both were. The last words I said to our beautiful boy were, ‘You are absolutely perfect, our darling boy. We are so lucky to be your mommy and daddy. We love you so much.’ We didn’t get a conclusive reason for Ari’s death. The autopsy showed a perfectly healthy baby boy.”

‘I know you can get through this.’ This nurse was the age of my mother. She embraced me in a warm hug, and peace came over me.’: Mom recalls heartbreak as first son is born still, ‘he would’ve been an amazing human’

“The doctor was holding a box of tissues. I let out the most piercing wail. I was inconsolable. I asked my husband, ‘Can we pray?’ It was the only time I saw him break down. We both buckled at the knees. I was lead back to a corner room at the end of the hallway. A nurse was there. ‘I am sorry for your loss.’ My son had an aura around him, an angelic light radiating behind him.”

‘Are you serious? I’m going to be a dad!’ Then all of it was gone, just gone! I tried to stay strong, but all I could do was cry.’: Dad emotionally recalls pain of stillborn son, ‘My heart was full knowing I got to hold my little boy’

“I had just come home from working a 12-hour shift. ‘How are you feeling? How’s the baby?’ She said her back was hurting, but we weren’t really worried. I woke up to Taylor yelling for me from the bathroom. I ran to see her kneeling by the toilet with blood on the floor. ‘We need to get to the hospital, quick!’ I had no idea what was going on. We jumped in the car. I was scared, but I didn’t want her to know. He was such a beautiful boy.”

‘How the hell did I end up here?’ It took me months to say, ‘My child died.’ We hung her stocking. I’m finally ready.’: Mom celebrates stillborn during holidays for surviving twin to know ‘her sister’s spirit is with her for her lifetime’

“I can’t tell you how many times I’ve answered, ‘How are you?,’ with a forced, fake, ‘Hanging in there!’ just to make the conversation easier. We hung her Christmas stocking on the mantle this year. I am painfully aware that on Christmas morning, that stocking will hang empty as the others burst with gifts. ‘Why me? Why our family?’ But for now, we honor her absence. I am finally ready.”

‘Good thing you didn’t get attached.’ He wasn’t a puppy. Jensen was my child, my sweet baby. I’ll always be attached.’: Mother recalls rude comments she’s heard since her son was stillborn, ‘Do not compare anything to losing a child’

“‘Isn’t it time for you to be moving on?’ No. I will never move on. My child died, it’s not like I lost an earring. You don’t just pick up and move on to the next thing. ‘God wanted him more.’ This did not comfort me. My doctor said this. He didn’t call Jensen a him, he actually said, ‘God wanted it more.’ My son is not an it.”

‘You’re only 19 weeks, it’s too early.’ I was scared to hold him. But THAT was love at first sight.’: Woman’s baby born still after years of infertility, ‘he has changed my life, even when he is not here’

“’How far along are you? You aren’t due til November!’ My mom thought I was playing a trick on her, but she could see I’d been crying. My worst fear had come true. I knew I’d hate myself if I never took any photos, so I took an abundance. I needed to have that for my son. The worst part? Knowing it was the first and last time I’d ever hold him again.”

‘Why weren’t we told this sooner? Obviously they suspected brain bleeds. Why didn’t we know?’: Newborn suffers brain bleeds in-utero, defies all odds to survive, ‘he’s leaving a trail of middle fingers behind him for the naysayers’

“My husband arrived just seconds before the doctor said, ‘He is out!’ I was certain he had died. I couldn’t stop shaking while they stitched me up. But he was perfect, with a surprising amount of thick, dark hair. ‘There’s a high likelihood he’ll never walk or talk.’ They asked if we wanted to stop life-saving measures. We stood our ground. He’d be our ‘wayfinder.’ We trusted he’d tell us in his own way if things became too much, and it was time to stop fighting.”

‘I placed him in a box, handing him off to a stranger. ‘I love you, Ren,’ I whispered to my son.’: Father tearfully recalls needing to be the ‘superhero’ after losing newborn, ‘I began to break’

“As my wife looked at his little face, she asked me to hand her a wet washcloth. Confused, I then watched as she began to softly dab his little dried up lips. She nurtured and cared for our little boy’s fragile body. I have so much gratitude to this woman. How strong she is. Not only did she say hello to our son for the first time, but soon, she was going to be forced to say goodbye. The thought haunted me.”

‘Am I really going to be a dad?’ He smiled. ‘You aren’t mad?’ We were too young to have kids.’: Mom suffers PTSD after son is stillborn, ‘they couldn’t find anything wrong’

“He sat on the couch next to me. HE STARTED CRYING! As soon as I stepped on the linoleum, I felt a HUGE gush! A puddle of bright, red blood. His face turned white, his eyes were huge. ‘Has he moved at all today? Could you feel him?!’ I felt my heart shatter. I had one job. All I had to do was keep my baby safe. This can’t be real, it’s a nightmare. ‘Taylor…I’m so sorry.’ We studied him so we wouldn’t forget anything. He was perfect. It actually surprised me.”

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