“You are too skinny, not tall enough, and you have never delivered a baby before. More than likely, you will have an unsuccessful triplet pregnancy.” That’s what my first doctor told me at my first ultrasound with her. I knew based off her lack of support I needed to find a Perinatologist who supported me and would do everything she could to help me have a successful triplet pregnancy. And I did.
My pregnancy was nothing short of a miracle, and so was my delivery. I made it to our goal date, 34 weeks and 1 day. I had a cerclage at 14 weeks which I really believed helped save my pregnancy and helped me carry my babies to our goal. I remember waking up the morning of my scheduled C-section and my heart was overwhelmed because I was finally going to become a mother.
We also had our families there with us waiting upon the arrival of our hope babies. I remember walking into my delivery room, a room full of at least 20 people, all there for me and my babies. Ryan was right by my side to help keep me calm as my doctor proceeded to deliver my babies. “I think something is happening,” I said to him. And that was when our doctor pulled Charlize out. Next came Sawyer, and then Jax. As I laid on the operating table I watched Ry as he doted over our babies. My heart felt at peace. Our babies were quickly sent to the NICU and Ry went with them. I started to doze in and out.
I remember being in recovery with my mom. I was so glad she could be there with me because that was when things took a turn for the worse. I started hemorrhaging. Blood clots the size of golf balls were coming out of me. My uterus was not contracting back. I was high risk for this happening and my doctor was prepared. She even had blood ready during my delivery.
I don’t remember much of this time and only really know what I’ve been told. “We need to get in the OR now,” my doctor said. Then she turned to my mom and said, “You need to find Ryan. And pray. She has lost a lot of blood.” I can only imagine those moments for my mom. And the moments following as she told Ryan.
I had blood transfusions and got a vaginal pack to help stop the bleeding. The hours following were incredibly painful, and I could barely stay awake. I was surrounded by an incredible team of nurses and doctors who worked hard to save my life. I begged to see my babies, but I was not strong enough to even get out of bed.
Ry introduced me to our children through FaceTime. I remember feeling like I wasn’t enough, like I failed them because my first moments with them were through a phone.
It took a full day before I was wheeled into the NICU where I got to see my long-awaited hope babies. That moment was everything. I wish I could re-live it over and over. My babies were finally here, and I finally was a mother.
My birth story was traumatic and frightening, but I’m thankful for my life, and for my doctors and nurses who saw me through my delivery that day. We don’t always get to choose our birth story. It doesn’t always turn out exactly how we imagined it would, and whatever your story is, it truly is a beautiful miracle.
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